is something we must do but I find myself asking how. How are we supposed to just let go? We realize that the girls never belonged to us and that they are Renay's children and ultimately it's her decision. I wish we didn't know what day they are going to be born. Knowing the date just makes me want to be there more. We stayed guarded for a long time when we first matched and as things progressed we dropped that guard. It just seemed soo real!
We had a good weekend all in all. We went out of town Saturday and came home Sunday. It was nice to be able to just get away. I think it was the first step in healing our hearts. We really needed that time together! We pray that we NEVER have to experience this pain again. We thank God for not letting us meet them before Renay changed her mind! After holding them in our arms I think we would have rather died than to have given them up.
I spoke with our coordinator yesterday and if for some reason Renay reconsiders placing the girls they would call us first. For now we have decided to proceed onto the next step. We can't get our heart set on her changing her mind. If it happens that's great if not we have moved on. They will start showing our profile and DVD to potential birthmoms ASAP. When the time is right God will bless us with a family!
Missy the verse below that you sent me to a while back has helped me through this!
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, lean not unto your own understanding, but in all your way acknowledge him and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6
4 comments:
Amanda, and Chad,
I cannot express how sorry I am after reading your news! I cannot even imagine your pain. No one should ever have to go through this.
I am glad however that you are on the path to healing, slowly.
Take care of each other.
Vanessa
Call me if you need me. Daniel and I are here for you.
We love you both.
Love,
Julie
I am so sorry. Praying that the Lord will uphold you during this disappointment.
We're going through the adoption process too, currently wondering if a match will go through. Feel free to email me or visit my blog...Through blogging I have met a wonderful group of ladies who have been through some of the same things you're facing. You're not alone! Wishing you all the best,
We love you both very much and not because of being kin, but love you through God's eyes. We think of you daily. Mrs Watson just called to see if I had heard from you. She is thinking and praying for you. Just know you are in our prayers. Call if you need anything.
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